Happy Cheese Day

Connor Scott Dixon

January 29, 2001-March 25, 2008

Today would have been my nephew Connor's 9th Birthday. He was a happy, lively, sweet little boy, who loved cheese. So in honor of him every year, at his parents request, we celebrate Cheese Day on his birthday. We try to make it a day of happiness and smiles and save the tears for later, in March. I thought that I would just write a few of my favorite things about Connor on this his Birthday.

Connor was the baby who helped me learn how to be a mom. I am the youngest and never really got to be around babies. Connor was the first grand baby and we all loved him right from the start. I remember the first time Annie let me feel him kick in her belly. It was the first time I had ever felt that, and it changed my whole outlook on life. Something was living inside my sister and it was going to come to our family and be a part of us. I loved him from that minute on.

The summer after he was born Annie decided to go back to school and she let me watch him one day a week while she did that. Often it would be nap time when I would get him, but I would still selfishly go into his room and scoop him up and make him take his nap with me holding him. I loved everything he did. I remember wondering with the family, what we did before there was Connor. We would just sit around and watch him no matter what it was, from lifting a gallon of milk and flexing his muscles, to crawling around, to lining up his toys.

We later learned that Connor had autism. This once again, taught me more than I ever could have imagined. He taught me how to be patient and understanding and the concept of turn taking with children, rather than sharing. He was not the typical child with autism. Connor was so loving. He loved to snuggle and I would take them gladly any time that he would give them.

There are so many things that I could say about him. He holds such a special place in my heart. So much so, that we named Levi after him, Levi Connor. I watched as his Mommy raised and loved him and was better prepared to be a mommy to my own children because he let me practice on him. But one of the things I will remember most about Connor is how much he loved cheese. Cheddar cheese slices, macaroni and cheese, quesadillas, string cheese, you name it, if it had cheese he loved it. And as always, he would ask for it in his robotic tone, "I want cheese, please."

We love you Connor!

Pump It

I have a "pump it" song. This is a song that every time I hear it I just want to pump my fist in the air. It makes me feel empowered and like I could run for miles. Often, I use my pump it song to get me geared up to start a workout, or to clean the house, or to do something I am just finding it hard to get the motivation to do. I have even taught my children to pump their fists to these songs and dance around. They know that Mom is getting down to business when these songs come on. They even tell me now if they hear my pump it song and I have not. I love to see their little fists going in the air and it gives me even more power to conquer the world.


I often have several pump it songs that come in and out. Some only stay for a couple of weeks, some stay for years. Currently, one is the first song on the "Twilight" soundtrack, "Supermassive Black Hole" by Muse. (Who are turning out to be one of my favorite bands of all time.) This song comes on and I feel like I should be at a bench press pushing 150 pounds, or at least walking around like I could beat up a 150 lb dude. Oh, Twilight, how I love thee.

While I truly do enjoy "Supermassive" it is not my true-blue pump it song. That title must belong to Cold Play's "Viva la Vida." (I truly did not notice until just know the coincidence between my pump it song and the title of our blog, but it just makes it that much more appropriate and not just something that Landon spouted off to be funny and I wrote out.) This song has been my song for over two years now. It has helped me accomplish many things, but I am now leaning on it to help me accomplish even more.

I have decided to run a marathon. I have never been a really diligent runner. I love doing it and have gone through periods of my life when I have actually been pretty routine with it, but I have never by any means been a long distance runner. In fact, the most I think I have ever run at one time is 6 miles. It has always been about the length of time I run not the distance, but now, I want it to be about the distance. I want to be able to say that I have conquered my own weaknesses and run 26 miles, 385 yards.


Now I am well aware that I could fail miserably. There is a good chance that I will be lying in the middle of the road puking my guts out by mile 6, but I am going to try. Thankfully I have good guidance. My best friend Becky has run several and is giving me good support in my initial crazy thoughts. (Yes, this is the same Becky who got me blogging. It seems that this is the year to become more like Becky. What have you done to me?) I have begun a spring training regiment this week and will run a total of 9 miles by weeks end.


The ultimate goal, of course, will be to run the marathon in the fall. I have it narrowed down to two, either the Pocatello Marathon or the Mesa Falls Marathon is Ashton, ID. They are a week apart at the end of August and the beginning of September. I hope by writing it here this will give me more people to be accountable to. More people who will know of my humiliation if I fail, or to be truthful, if I succeed. I will conquer, and my pump it song will take me there.


VIVA LA VIDA!!!

Carousel

Do you ever feel like your life is a carousel ride? I love Carousels. The horses go up and down and are incredibly fun to ride while you go round and round. But sometimes while on the ride it can start to feel a little monotonous or you can even begin to feel sick. That is how I have been feeling this week.



I love my life. My children make me so happy, they are a lot of work, but they are the joy of my life. I love my husband and he too truly makes me happy. Most of the time I can't complain about my life. It is good! But this week, I have been feeling a little sick.



Last Monday night Landon found out that he had been dismissed from his program. He has received 2 C's and 1 B- and that constitutes dismissal. It has been a week of surreal feelings and a lot of worrying. It truly feels like someone has ripped my future out of my hands. Landon was 6 months from graduating and we would be moving on with our lives. Finally out of the poor college student era and on to building stability and a growing, budding future. It was so close that I could taste it, and while it is not gone entirely darkness has veiled it again.


Landon still intends on completing his program. We will fight through this somehow, by either appealing the decision of his professors or reapplying for the program. It just adds time on to our ride. So, life becomes a little monotonous for us and for now we feel a little sick. But, just as on a carousel the ride is still fun. I still have babies who love me and bring me joy. My husband, while floundering a little now is a good, strong man who loves the gospel and will find a way to take care of us. I have been blessed with good friends and family who will help us through the nauseousness. And then, I will begin to get my bearings and enjoy the ride again.

It's a Tooth!!!

Levi is a major drooler. Not that that is a big surprise. Lots of kids are droolers. He has been a drooler for months now. I didn't even think twice about it because neither of my other kids teethed until pretty late. Trevor got his first tooth at 10 1/2 months and Ellen didn't even break a tooth until two weeks before her first birthday. So it was to my great surprise to find a tooth in Levi's mouth.

We were watching a movie the other night and Levi was nawing away at my leg when I picked him up to play with him. Just for fun I stuck my finger in his mouth to see if he by the slightest of chance had a tooth and just about threw him off my lap when a sharp little something scraped my finger. It is his right bottom tooth and it definetly is there. We are excited!

A very proud Levi!

Levi giving his Mommy a kiss.

Away We Go

The weekend of New Years we went sledding for the first time of the year. In fact, it was the first time in a couple of years. We never actually made it to a hill last year. We got the kids dressed up in their snow stuff and drug them around the yard, but never actually went sledding. So to actually go to the hill was a big deal this year. I just got the pictures from Eric, so that is why it is only being posted now.

Landon, Trevor, Brenen, Skyler, and Abel. Levi and I are in the back.

We went with Eric and Brenen and Eric's brother-in-law Abel and his little boy Skyler. We went to Ammon park and it was a nice sunny day. While the snow was not plentiful it was perfect on that hill for sledding. Our kids loved it!! Trevor could not get enough of it. He would go down the hill with anyone that would take him. He went down sitting in front of Daddy, laying on Daddy's back, in a train with Brenen, on the little pink sled that nobody could stay on with Mommy. You name it, he did it. He even tried going down on the pink sled by himself once. He only made it about half way, but didn't complain when he fell off.

Trevor and Brenen in a train.

Ellen did pretty good as well. She really liked going down the hill, but didn't like the climb up. She also got more scared the more her Daddy tried to get her to go down different ways. Ellen eventually gave up and decided that pretending that she was the sled was the better way to be. She would go down the hill on just her belly, feet first, pushing herself with her hands. When she got to the bottom, she would climb back up and then get herself ready to go again. Many times we could hear her talking to her imaginary friends as she prepared to push herself down the mountain. She would explain how they should ride on her to get safely to the bottom. When she wasn't pretending to be a sled, she enjoyed playing on the park toys even though they were covered with snow.

Ellen riding on Daddy's back.

Levi also came with us. The only snow suit we have that will fit him is an 18 month one, but it keeps him plenty warm. I actually almost prefer it for his size because the arms are too big so his hands only make it about half way down the sleeves so his hands stay plenty warm. He enjoyed watching everybody go down and even rode down with Mommy a few times. He only started to cry at the end when he got so tired and his little face got really cold. Besides that he was a trooper and it was such an enjoyable day. The perfect outing for our little family.

Landon and Levi. Trevor, Landon, Levi and Ellen.

And thus it begins!

Trevor invited Levi to play with him today and he got more than he was expecting. Trevor was playing with the blanket and decided to wrap it around both he and Levi so that they could hide. Levi quickly found his way out, but then turned and tried to dive back under the blanket. Trevor tried pulling away, but Levi was in hot pursuit. Before Trevor knew it, Levi was on top of him. Trevor was giggling and Levi was screaming triumphantly. Levi had him pinned for a couple of minutes before Trevor escaped.

When we found out we were pregnant with Levi, Landon got so excited. He has always loved having his brothers be close in age to him, and he promised that wrestling would ensue. Little did we know that it would begin so early, and that the little one would have the upper hand...And thus it begins!

Primary

Sunday was Trevor's first day of Primary. Ellen was such a pro with going to Primary, that we really thought that Trevor would do just fine as well. Boy were we wrong.

Ellen sat quietly with her new teacher and was excited to be moved back a row. She loved having Trevor there, and I think was better behaved in Primary than she has been in a long time. Trevor, was an entirely different matter.

First, he went to nursery, and I had to go pull him out to bring him to Primary. Once there, we found him a chair that he began moving around the room. We finally got him to sit down next to his teacher but it was a constant battle of his teacher grabbing him and making him sit and me giving glares and pointing from my corner. Singing time went well, but in the middle of Sharing Time, he turned to the Primary Presidency member who had to come hold him and said, "I do not like this." After she wouldn't let him up he proceeded to begin yelling for "Help! Help!" until they had to leave Primary. Once outside he escaped from her and found his way back to the nursery. Luckily I was there and just about done singing with them so that I could scoop him up screaming that he wanted to stay in nursery and take him back to his class. Once in class, he tried to escape through the door for the first 5 minutes, then resigned himself to staying (mostly because Daddy had come to class as well and he knew he wasn't getting out the door past him) but then he refused to color his picture instead deciding that coloring on his tie would be better.

Once primary was actually over we had to wait a few minutes while Landon had his Elder's Quorum Presidency meeting. As soon as we entered the classroom I have designated to contain them in during this meeting, he began trying to peel his clothes off. Apparently he was done with Sunday and didn't want to have even his Sunday clothes on anymore. It was all we could do to keep him in them until we got home. Once we got home, the shirt was unbuttoned and happiness ensued.

I had been hoping to get a picture with Ellen of his first big day in Primary, and I got one. It just isn't as cute and prestine as I had hoped. Oh, well...what you gonna do?

Sharing Our Lives

I have never really been into the blogging scene. I couldn't understand why people did it, or I just didn't think I had time. But this summer, my perception changed. My best friend, Becky, has become an avid blogger and this summer she went through some really challenging things. She lives in Colorado and we don't get to talk much and I worried about her terribly. I was so grateful when she started blogging about her experiences and sharing what was going on. I could get an update on her and not have to bug her with my incessant phone calls.

Then, the kicker came, she told me that she prints out their blog every year.

Ahhhh....the angels were singing in my head. I have always been a scrapbooker, but I have never done a good job and keeping us even remotely caught up. Finding the time to scrapbook has really become a luxury. This blog thing seemed like a really good compromise for me. I could keep a journal of our lives add in pictures and keep it forever. I love this idea!

We'll see how it goes and how I do. I hope that it can be fun for everyone and not just for me. Hopefully it will give you some insights into our family and keep you informed of our goings on. I pray that I will be able to be as open as Becky has so that my family and friends can to share in our lives with us.

So, enjoy. Let me know what you think. I am sure things will change as I continue to figure out how to do this and what I like so bear with me. And thanks a ton Becky for the inspiration!